what would i do if i was in their shoes

                                     What would i do if i was in a rape victims shoes? 
                       How would i handle being raped? well i would never want it to happen to me. i'd be as safe as possible, follow any advice i was given to avoid it happening to me. i would always have a buddy tag along with me when i would go out to a party. i'd definately keep an eye on my drink at all times. I would definately avoid anyone who's had a little too much too drink, and if they start acting strange i would just make up some excuse to get away from them. and if that didn't work i would just walk away. 

                         If it did happen to me i know the first thing i would never do is take a shower, you never wanna shower after a rape cause that will wipe all the DNA away. The first thing i would definately do is go to the hospital or the police to report it. i would not want the person to get away with it. i'd definately want them to pay for the crime they committed, i know i would have tons of nightmares, i wouldn't be able to get that out of my head for a long time. i mean how can someone just go and hurt someone like that ? that's been my question all along

.                     I know i would definately wanna find out who committed the crime so i could take them to court, and they can get the punishment they deserve. I mean who else wouldn't want them to get away with that? i know tons of people that go through this have a hard time reporting it, because their either threatened or know the person and don't wanna say anything. i know wheather i knew the person or not i would still wanna see them pay for what they did.

                        

How do you help a friend who's been Raped?

                                           How do you help a friend who's been Raped? 
                      Rape I don't know how many times i gotta say this , is a very sick and tragic thing to happen to anyone. There are lots of ways you could help someone out , like a close friends who's been raped. I am gonna give you a few tips on how to help someone out in a scary situation like this. Even though it may be hard on this friend to accept help from you, you never wanna give up, u wanna encourage your friend as much as you can. Here are the six tips for everyone out there................


                      First you wanna close your mouth, and open your ears and realize this isn't about you.  Given options , questioning the details and getting angry for the rape victim isn't gonna help them out, it just takes away from how they are feeling.  Let them talk , cry, scream, or yell , or reflect all without judging or trying too hard to understand them. Second tip you wanna know is, you always wanna encourage them to seek professional help , but you never wanna force a rape victim to speak with a counselor or report the incident to authorities.  Telling them what to do after being raped can re-traumatize the victim.  Let them tell their story on what happened , then you can make some suggestions for them but never insist on anything. 


                    Third tip you wanna know is , always ask the victim what they need from you rather then presuming what that is.  You may think that your friend needs a hug, their family around them , or a good old fashioned cry but this may not be the case.  Everyone handles the soul intrusion that is rape in different ways and it is important to always ask the victim what they want or need.  Fourth tip you wanna know is, you wanna try and get the rape victim to eat something at regular intervals.  The shock and the trauma of rape can send even the healthiest personality into a tailspin when their everyday functioning is impaired.  Your friend will feel much better if they keep up their energy, but always be careful to never force food on them as that may set off more emotional problems for them. 


                        The fifth tip you wanna know is , Avoid touching the victim in any way that makes them uncomfortable or re-traumatizes them. After a rape any sort of touch from a hug to a tap on the shoulder can cause the victim to relive parts of the rape. Discuss what level of touch is appropriate for your friend see what their comfortable with. The sixth and last tip you wanna know is , .Realize that your most important job as a friend of a rape victim is to make them understand that what happened is not their fault. This is the most difficult of things because most victims feel they created the circumstances of their rape. Of course this is never true and your job as a good friend is to keep emphasizing the concept of bad luck and chance and to move the victim away from such concepts as self blame, fate, cursed or preventable circumstances.
                    


                     

Date Rape Statistics

                                                                  Statistics on Date Rape   

                             Somewhere in America, a women is raped every two minutes, according to the U.S. Department of Justice. One in four women are victims of rape or attempted rape, 84 % of those women knew their attacker, 57 % of the rapes have happened while on dates. About 42 % of the victims told no one, 38 % of the women raped are between the ages of 14-17. 75 % of men and 55 % of the women involved in date rape had been drinking or taking drugs before the attack occured. 

                             Here are some statistics throughout the years of 1992 and 1996,  The National Crime Victimization Survey indicates that for 1992-1993, 92% of rapes were committed by known assailants.1 About half of all rapes and sexual assaults against women are committed by friends and acquaintances, and 26% are by intimate partners.1

Risk factors for perpetrating sexual violence include: early sexual experience (both forced and voluntary),6 adherence by men to sex role stereotyping,7,8 negative attitudes of men towards women,6,9,,10,11,12, alcohol consumption,8,13 acceptance of rape myths by men.8,9,12,14,15.
                             The Adult pregnancy rate associated with rape is estimated to be about 4.7 %, this information This information, in conjunction with estimates based on the U.S. Census, suggest that there may be 32,101 annual rape-related pregnancies among American women over the age of 18.17
Non-genital physical injuries occur in approximately 40% of completed rape cases.18 As many as 3% of all rape cases have non-genital injuries requiring overnight hospitalization.19
Victims of rape often manifest long-term symptoms of chronic headaches,18,20fatigue20, sleep disturbance20, recurrent nausea,20 decreased appetite,21 eating disorders,22 menstrual pain,18 sexual dysfunction,23 and suicide attempts.21 In a longitudinal study, sexual assault was found to increase the odds of substance abuse by a factor of 2.5.24.
                        Those are all the statistics that i have read about and wow i am shocked at a lot of it . how much pregnancies are involved, how much the person is associated to their attacker. Why they won't turn their attacker in. well i could understand some of them not wanting to turn their attacker in or not wanting to report the rape. Cause some may be threatened by their attacker that if they report it that they'll come after them and that kind of scares them away from reporting the case. it just makes me sick how cruel and sadistic people are in this world, it saddens me how much women have gone through in this sort of case. 

how does date rape effect someone emotionally?

                         The effects of date rape are emotional as well as physical. After effects can include loss of trust in oneself and others, because a woman who knew her assailant may lose confidence in her ability to judge a person or their character. She may become fearful of many situations, particularly those that are new to her. She may go out of her way so much to avoid interactions with men, potentially causing difficulty for her in her daily routines and responsibilities that she has, such as going to class, or speaking to professors and acquaintances.
                     She may even feel the need to avoid her attacker, who may be a part of her daily life and watching her every move she makes. . Depression is a big effect after rape, and anxiety is common effects of rape, adding to the feelings of helplessness that a woman may already be experiencing. She may feel guilty or ashamed, blaming herself for the attack thinking she did something to cause it. Sexual problems may occur as a result of the woman and her partner being uncertain about how to relate to one another sexually after the assault not sure what to do.
                               i think date rape would be a very emotional thing to deal with if you've gone through that experience. i know if i  went through that experience i would have lots of nightmares, and it would hunt me for the rest of my life. i know someone who went through that situation and they shut themselves away from everyone, was too afraid to say anything to anyone not sure if they would believe, date rape or any rape for that matter is serious and very sick. i hope no one else has to go through that pain ever again.

The Consequences of date rape

             I think that someone who rapes somebody should serve a long sentence to make them learn their lesson for what they did, but i can't judge and that's not up to me to decide, but what i'm gonna talk about this weeks is what are the consequences of date rape? and how much jail time the person serves. it is not only men who rape but it's also the men who can be victims as well. 

          Going to prison is something that most people fear , the thought of their freedom being taken away for just maybe a few months is enough to keep most of them on a straight and narrow path. however be one reason or another , insanity or anger every once in awhile someone has a fall out with the law. fortunately in most of the countries the punishment always fits the crime. while a serious crime like date rape may result in a longer sentence or even life in prison. Justice varies from country to country in other states or terratories it may result in a leniant sentence.

              There are some countries that have zero policy and deliver a swift and final sentencing which may result in execution for which we would consider a lesser offense. for example in the middle east crimes such as rape, and murder have worser penalties that might include castration, Death or even a hand cut off in that exact order. there have however been tons of cases of record breaking jail sentences being handed down. but not all life sentences are created equal. in some of the countries life in prison may mean 20 years , with the opportunity of parole after 10 years or more. 

              So basically you heard my opinion already in the beginning of this blog and what i believe, i think the person should suffer in jail for what they did. make realize how wrong that crime was. what they can do to better themselves. seek lots of professional help. i know some people who have been raped and it's been so hard on them , they still continue to have nightmares after all these years. i know if something like that happened to me i would still be having nightmares to this day. but i hope all the rapest out there can be caught and pay for the crime that they committed. 

Targets of Date Rape

                    It seems that women are more targets of date rape then men are , for example, 

Eleven women hospitalised in Washington after their drinks were spiked with a date rape drug at a university party. Eleven women were rushed to the hospital after suffering heavy overdoses at the same party , may have had their drinks spiked with a very powerful date rape drug. Men at the party attended by Central Washington University students on Saturday night are being quizzed among suspicion that the victims were specifically targetted because of their gender. 

All but one of the twelve people who fell sick were women. 

Roslyn-Cle Elium Police Chief Scott Ferguson have said that 

‘It’s certainly a concern we have – that the women were targetted more than the men for possible nefarious reasons,’ which isn't right at all.

                    None of the women who were overdosed said they had been drinking heavily or taking any drugs , most of the women said that they only had one or two alcoholic drinks that night. 

‘Their level of intoxication just didn’t seem to make sense,’ he said. ‘We don’t believe this was just a result of heavy drinking. Whatever happened up there was not consensual or agreed upon. they don't believe that this was just a result of heavy drinking either. police aren't exactly sure what drug they had used . they are suspecting that the drugs that was used in the date rape were Roofies or some type of ecstacy, but that has yet to been found out. 

                         

                    Roofie', short for rohypnol, is another name for flunitrazepam, a tasteless and odourless  sedative more commonly known as the date-rape drug because it also  

causes amnesia where the victim won't remember anything that happened. and ecstacy is a  (Medicine / Pharmacology) Slang 3,4-methylenedioxymethamphetamine; MDMA: a powerful drug that acts as a stimulant and can produce hallucinations. Many women were falling all over puking and getting sick , the ambulance was called immediately. the ones that brought their own alcohol or drink didn't fall sick, but the ones that didn't bring their own drinks all ended up puking. all the women who were hospitalized recovered in a few days. there were no suspects found, there was one man who was arrested when he was caught having sex with a half semi conscious woman , after he was arrested it was confirmed that the victim was actually his girlfriend. the university said everyone was shakened and saddened by this incident, and it will never be forgotten. 

                     That's why i feel you need to always make sure that you only drink at least a couple drinks so you don't get too intoxicated, that way you can remember what's going on in front of you. if the person starts coming on too strong come up with something to get them to back. what happened to these girls is sad and sickening, how could anyone in their right mind do that to someone this memory will haunt these girls for the rest of their lives. i don't think they'd wanna go to anymore party's after that, but some do. i just advise you to be cautious and careful. never lose sight of anything.i know if i was in that situation i wouldn't be able to forget about it for a long time. but i'm a very cautious and careful person and i will always keep my eye out and stay catious.

How to Prevent yourself From Date Rape

        Ways to prevent yourself from date rape, Although a good amount of society focuses on rape where the perpetrator is unknown to the victim, more then half of rape cases involves a victim who was aquainted to their attacker previously. Rapers always plan their attacks in advance, and most definately are looking for the opportunity to assault victims. No victim nor any manual can prevent Rape , as it is soley the crime of the attacker , but there are some safety precautions that can be implied.
         Steps to prevent date rape,  1. Always have have a sober buddy with you to watch over you and make sure you get home safely. 2. Never ever turn your attention away from your drink when your at a bar or party, cause in that split second of turning your head away someone could slip a date rape drug into your drink and you wouldn't even know. 3 Don't ever mix or share your drinks with anyone, and always get your own drink. 4. Never get too drunk to not be aware of what's going on , or your surroundings, cause when your really intoxiacted most of the time you space out and forget where your at, and again that gives your attacker a shot at attacking , so always be cautious. Always limit yourself to 1 bor 2 drinks.
              Before you even go out Look online at http://www.neighrborhoodscan.com/ and there it will show you how many sex offenders live in your area in like a minute so you can be aware. Once you have lost site of your drink never consume that drink anymore, always go and get another drink. Never do you want to give out any personal information about yourself such as , your daily schedule, or your location of where you live or whether you live alone or with someone, cause that will give your attacker ideas on how they can attack you, and when the right moment would be. You definately wanna let the person you came with that your leaving and where your going so they don't worry and they can find you easily.
              If you happen to be at a hotel or even a nightclub always ask a staff if someone would be able to escort you to your vehilcle . Don't you ever be afraid to leave if your starting to feel uncomfortable where your at , if someone you just met gives off this bad vibe, you want to leave immediately. Trust your instincts always , if your starting to feel wierd or uncomfortable come up with an excuse don't try to normalize it just say your feeling sick or about to throw up, never doubt your instincts either. A very good one to follow is to never ever go out with some random stranger you met on the street. I think this for good advice for all the young females out in this world always keep a close eye out for anything strange, follow your instinc and trust it. 

Date Rape Case

             One of the cases that i thought was interesting, took place in Wayne's County Michigin, The date-rape and death of a girl named samantha on January, 16, 1999. samantha was at a party with her friend Melanie and someone spiked her soft drink with (GHB) also known as Gamma Hydroxybutydrate which is a very dangerous drug to ingest. she ended up in the hospital that nite and died the next morning, January, 17, 1999 she was only 15 years old, her friend melanie now 16 also got her drink spiked and ingested the drug as well, she was briefly in a coma , but survived.

           The Suspects involved in the rape and murder of samantha , were, Joshua cole 19, Daniel Brayman 18, and nicholas holtschlag 18, the 4th defendent erick limmer 26, was found guilty of one of each count each of being an accessory to manslaughter  after the fact of poisoning , delivery or marijuana possession of the (GHB) drug. they were also all convicted of manslaughter which carries a  sentence up to 15 years in prison, the penalty for the poisoning convictions was immediately cleared which i don't agree on if you want my opinion. 

(GHB) is a colorless and oderless drug that can cause the victim to become unconscious and non responsive within 20 minutes the victims frequently have no memory or recall what happened. this drug is very difficult to trace , it usually leaves the body within 24 hours. in 1990 the (FDA) banned this drug for public sale and in 1998 Michigan law made possessing the drug as a felony. the attorneys for Brayman and Holtschlag have constantly argues that their clients were unaware that GHB was present . 

        I'm gonna give my opinion on this case, i think that they knew what they were doing , it's just when you get really wasted you have no idea what you do, that's why you gotta watch how much you drink or how fast you drink it. my heart goes out to the family members of samantha that girl was so young and could've had a longer life ahead ., but 4 sick mindless guys had to ruin it for her which is beyond messed up i hope they got what was coming to them and that they fry in jail for their mistakes. and to melanie all the nightmares she probably has thinking about it, the best advice i could give is if your out at a party please keep and eye on your drink don't ever turn away, dont ever share drinks with anyone and always have a buddy with you that isn't as drunk so you can be safe and protected, i hope that everyone listens to this advice and stays safe..... 

 

Date rape drugs what they are and how they affect you

                 Date Rape drugs what are date rape drugs? well generally speaking they are substances that make you incapable or saying no or asserting yourself. also your needs can be used for date rape , these needs include, alcohol , marijuana or lots of other street drugs that can be very harmful to you.

 what kinds of rape drugs are used ? one of the kinds of dape rape drugs are (GHB) also know as Gamma Hydroxy Butyrate - (GHB) has a few forms , white powdery substance, and pill,. This can make your drink taste a little salty  if you mix it with a sweet drink such as fruit juice. this drug can take about 10-15 minutes to kick into your system. and it's lost about 4 hours later. A very small can have a very big effect on you.

                  (GHB) can cause some of these problems like, drowsiness, nausea, vomiting, sweating, tremors and so on, you can easily overdose on this drug. Most (GHB) is made by people in street "labs" or even at home. So you won't really know what's in it or how it will affect you. Another type of date rape drug is Rohypnol , which is a trade  name for Forflunitrazepam (FLOO-neye-TRAZ-uh-pam) it is a pill that disolves in liquid.  Some are small, round and white. Some of the newer pills are oval or green and gray in color. When on of these pills slipped in a drink the dye in these newer pills turn clear liquids blue.  They may also be ground up into powder, the effects or Rohypnol take effect within 30 minutes of being drugged and can last for several hours. 

                Some of the problems that this pill can cause is, muscle relaxation  or even loss of muscle control , stomach problems, low blood pressure, nausea, or even death. Rohypnol is also known as , forget pill, lunch money, , rib or roach. so how can we stop date rape drug from being used? well first if your at a party or bar don't ever look away from your drink or move it , cause right there is someone the opportunity to drug you. Don't ever share drinks, open containers yourself, have a non drinking friend with you to make sure nothing happens to you. I feel alot of people should listen to this and stay safe, that's my opinion.

What is Date Rape

             Date Rape, What is date rape? , Date rape is someone you know socially (but not family) makes you have sex with them when you don't want to. it could be some random person you met at a party, or someone you love and trust, including your boyfriend. They may use verbal or physical threats on you, or even try to blackmail you, or use alchohol or drugs to to try and force you to have sex with them. it's not just sexual intercourse, it can also be oral or some other type of sex. or you may even agree to have sex with this person then decide it's not what you want and tell them to stop and they won't.  

            Date Rape is often a bigger problem in abusive relationships. abuse in a relationship occurs when one partner tries to hurt or control their partner. it a repetative pattern, not just a one time occurence, it happens over and over again, And each time it happens it gets worse. There are 3 main types of abuse in a relationship, the first one is Emotional abuse, like putting you down , calling you rude ignorant names, blackmailing you, and controlling who you hang out with. Second one is Physical abuse, hitting, punching , kicking, or smashing stuff. 3rd and main one is Sexual abuse,Which is of course forcing you to have sexual intercourse against your will.

            There are a lot of helpful organizations Date rape or even just rape, i will list 3 helpful orginizations and briefly explain how what each one is for. The first one is (SOAR) Speaking out about rape- runs a national awareness and prevention program to empower survivors of sexual violence and enhance the public understanding and acceptence of rape victims. The second one is (NSVRC) The National Sexual Violence Resource Center- is a national sexual violence resource center. It is a comprehensive collection center for information, research, and emerging policy on sexual violence prevention and intervention. And the 3rd one is RAINN- in cooperation with more then 600 rape crisis centers around the country. It operates a free , 24 hour hotline for survivors of Sexual Assault.  

           Here are some ways to avoid a date rape situation, Don't ever use alchohol or drugs, never put yourself in a secluded area always surround yourself with friends, never leave your drink unattended at a party or social event, if you do not like how someone is touching you speak up and say no or stop, don't let them continue to do it, beware of potential signs of abusers. Some signs of potential rapist or abusers are, extreme case of jealousy, drug or alcohol abuse, past experiences with violence, exteme mood swings ( loses their temper very easily). Date rape to me is a very sick and sadistic crime, and no one should ever have to go through that experience ever.